By John Valentik, MS, CSCS, NASM-PES, FMS

A while back, say about 592 days or so, I wrote an article about 1,000 days of gratitude. You can find that here, if you’re interested. Fast forward to present day, and I’m proud to say that the streak continues. Now, at 1,592 consecutive days of writing in a gratitude journal, in addition to meditating, I am approaching another milestone. Sunday, August 25th marks four years since I lost my father to suicide and a near four and a half years since losing my stepfather to cancer. With this four year Angelversary, I felt compelled to write a follow up article on gratitude.

The past four and a half years have been a roller coaster of emotions. In addition to both my Dads, Paige and I have lost additional loved ones. We’ve also welcomed two wonderful children into the world. With our second, we found out at our twenty week appointment that Parker had a heart defect. We then spent the next twenty weeks driving back and forth to Hershey for appointments and delivered our little guy on March 13th, 2023 after Paige and I waited for his birth at the Ronald McDonald house for ten days. While there were (thankfully) no life-threatening issues during his birth, we spent the next four months planning for his heart surgery in July. Did I mention that I tore my ACL and had surgery two weeks after he was born?!

If you happened to read my original gratitude post, you’ll notice the theme has not changed. Earl Nightingale said it best, “we become what we think about.” I wholeheartedly believe that this is true. The law of attraction states the same belief; positive thoughts bring positive results into a person’s life, while negative thoughts bring negative outcomes. With anything we have going on in life, we always have control over how we react and what our perspective is. It doesn’t mean that things won’t be tough, because they absolutely will be at times. It’s just that we shouldn’t solely focus on these negatives. Even with the curve balls that life throws at us, we can look for the silver lining. Like instead of just dwelling on the fact that both of my dad’s never met either of my children, I try to focus on how the values they instilled in me are then shared with Charlotte and Parker. I would be a hypocrite if I didn’t admit that this void brings me to tears at times.

When times are good, gratitude is easy. Don’t just be thankful for the obvious, like getting that raise, going on vacation, moving into a bigger place, etc. Remember the little things that are overlooked 99% of the time. You may not be in perfect physical condition, but if you’re reading this article or able to move freely around your home, that’s something. The fact that you are reading this with internet access or cell data is pretty fantastic. What about this beautiful weather we’re experiencing? We don’t even consider these items until our internet goes out for 10 minutes, we wake up with a random ache or pain, or it’s raining and then all of the sudden the sky is falling!

In the difficult times, try to practice gratitude. This is more challenging for obvious reasons. This not only makes the difficult times a little more palatable, but it also makes the good times even better. A helpful insight that I read from a recent book (Outlive by Peter Attia) is that changing your behavior can change your mood. Often times we wait for that perfect situation where we feel willing and able to do something positive for ourselves. This doesn’t have to be the only scenario when something good happens. Even in a lower mood, take action by doing something positive for yourself, whether it’s writing in a gratitude journal, or exercising, and more often than not, that low mood may soften. This can start as small as you want so that the likelihood for success is sky high!

To close, be deliberate about gratitude in your life and I promise you that you will begin to find more and more to be grateful for. The people in our lives are probably the most obvious. Our partners, children, friends and family make the world go round. I urge anyone reading this post to not take that last sentence for granted. I lost my stepdad three months after he was diagnosed with cancer. My dad was more abrupt for obvious reasons. As sad as it is, there is no guarantee that you, me, or our favorite person on earth is promised tomorrow. The other big building blocks of our lives like our careers, neighborhood, and faith are great options as well. But don’t forget about the subtle things like the air in your lungs or your sight, on top of where you live, what you drive, and the clothes on your back. These are things that we sometimes curse in the wrong state of mind, but for millions of people out there, this would be such a blessing.

Remember, that you’re bound to get more of what you focus on. Thank you for reading!